


Solitude is Bliss

by Llama1412



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-12
Updated: 2010-10-12
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:02:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23485006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Llama1412/pseuds/Llama1412
Summary: Arthur was completely different when he was alone.
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Kudos: 19





	Solitude is Bliss

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on livejournal in 2010. Posted unedited.

Arthur was a lot of different things when he wasn't alone. Around the court, he was the perfect prince, the future king. Around his father, he was the dedicated son, obedient to a fault. Around the knights, he was a fighter, arrogant, strong, and above the rest of the world. Around Morgana, he was the little brat that had never learned how to grow up; teasing, mocking, and arguing, he did whatever he could to cause discord around her.

But that wasn't who he was alone. He was more than the sum of his different facades. Alone, he was the self-conscious reject son, the child without a mother that couldn't win his father's love. He was the determined warrior, the one who wouldn't stop training until he physically couldn't any longer. He was the kinesthetic learner, the man who faced his life like it was the next battle and there was no hope for victory. He refused to be defeated, but he was constantly losing to himself.

Merlin changed that. The reckless idiot that nose-dived into Arthur's life without a care taught him that he had to have the strength to fight for others, that as long as he was good enough for that, then he was worth something.

With Merlin in his life, he was a different person when he was alone. He still doubted himself and craved his father's love, but he had assurances now that he was doing at least something right. Now, he was allowed to show someone who he was while alone. He could enjoy solitude without drowning in it. Now, when he'd had enough of fighting off his self-defeating thoughts, he could call Merlin to him and remember that as long as he was strong enough to keep this man alive, he was good enough. There would always be room to improve, but Merlin would remind him that he was good enough as is.


End file.
